Ask Grad Girl: Networked Out
Posted on 25. Jun, 2009 by admin in Law Grads, Law School
Hi Grad Girl,
This semester I made a real effort to attend as many ‘networking’ nights as possible. I went to the cocktail parties, morning teas, product launches and even in one case, completely forced myself onto someone who probably just wanted her morning coffee. I’m actually quite a shy person but I’m forcing myself to get out there and put on the fake smile and charm.
The problem is, nothing comes of it. After every one of these schmooze fests I always come home feeling like a failure, because nothing ever happens. What should I be aiming for? What sort of outcome is meant to come out of these ‘networking’ events – because right now I’m confused. I guess I dont expect anyone to be so impressed with me that they immediately offer me a job straight away, but right now it just seems like I’m wasting my time because I never seem to get to the ‘next step’ – I dont even know what the next step is!
Any advice? I’m running out of fake smiles!
Cheers,
Networked Out.
——–
Hi Networked
This is a pretty tricky situation for young’uns in the law (and general professional) world. Personally, I think the whole “networking” thing has gotten out of hand and turned into this big deal that totally misses the point. The process and “techniques” are a really just relic of the 80s that Won’t Go Away. Like power suits and Wall Street douche-bags. Fake smiles and going to functions and launching yourself out of your comfort zone just to “meet people” should not be the point of networking.
Those artificial things aren’t what it’s really about.
At best, networking should be about using your contacts in ways that are beneficial to everyone, and faking it to meet people is quite obviously not going to get you anywhere. You don’t need to be someone outgoing and cool to network.
Because you already have a network. A network isn’t something you build by handing out business cards at poncey events. It’s the people you know, and will get to know later through the people you already know. A real network is something that grows organically, and there’s no real way to say “this is what you have to do” to build one.
The one thing that you should NOT do is be selfish. Don’t expect it to be all about you. Because if you’re going to these things hoping to meet someone who’ll give you a job, you will feel like a failure — that’s not how it works. Think about what YOU can contribute with/to people you meet, and you never know how the karma will come back around.
As for the “next step” thing: to be honest, I don’t know what they are either! I suppose it depends on the event itself. You really need to know why you’re going there in order to figure out what you want to get from it. Why exactly are you going to the morning tea? What does the product being launched and the people who’ll be there have to do with your goals?
The “next step” is really WTF-ever you want it to be. And it might not come up for ages, and it might need a little more work on your part to get there.
But, for whatever dumb reason, the reality is that you’re going to keep getting bombarded with schmooze fests, so I’ll try my best with some tips to survive them.
- If it’s a law firm thing for interviewees: ask people who work there what they do and what they like about the firm, so that you can interview the place that you might be working at to see if it’s right for you, and to develop questions you might want to ask later at the actual interview.
- If it’s something less structured, try to invite someone else so that you have a buddy with you. And obviously if you get invited to something, the person who invited you should be hosting you and introducing you to people.
- Something you’ll notice as you get around the traps more often is that you will know other people there, be they from uni or an old job or a friend of a friend. Remember that whole organic thing and use those connections to make new ones.
- It really shouldn’t be about assaulting some random standing there with their coffee/canape. If they’re someone you know of, then use that as a way to get to know them personally.
So the bottom line is have a idea about what you want to get out of whatever function is forced upon you, but don’t force yourself upon a function just to say that you “networked” by going there. Because you haven’t.
And when you’re there: relax, talk to people who seem like they’re looking for someone to talk to, and keep an eye out for the six degrees of separation so that you can grow more connections from the ones you already have.
All the best
Grad Girl xoxo
